MARRIAGE COUNSELING CAN BE STRESSFUL!
By the time couples realize they need help with their marriage it is usually already in a crisis. According to Dr. John Gottman (www.gottman.com), most couples don't go to counseling until six years past time when they should have gone.
This is like taking aspirin for a headache when in reality you need brain surgery. In addition, you "expect" the aspirin to "do the trick."
COMING HOME FROM THE APPOINTMENT CAN BE TRAUMATIC!
The marriage counseling process in itself ends up being extremely stressful. First of all couples have to ride together in the car to the appointment. By the time they arrive they are entering the session already dysregulated. They spend 50-60 minutes trying to explain their situation. They realize it's impossible to sort things out in the session and they walk out perhaps even more hopeless than their arrival. Then back into the car, with either no words spoken all the way home or a huge fight over what was discussed and not settled in the session.
ARE YOU FRUSTRATED, DISCOURAGED OR TRAUMATIZED BY MARRIAGE COUNSELING?
Sometimes marriage counseling can be traumatizing! Marriage counseling can sometimes duplicate the marriage dynamic. Many times one person ends up being unheard or misunderstood and the other person feels angry and frustrated.
DOWNLOAD FREE E-BOOK: 10 REASONS MARRIAGE COUNSELING MIGHT NOT WORK
A surprising Consumer Reports found that more than 50$ of couples who underwent counseling saw their marriages either get worse or remain unchanged. Marriage Counseling has the lowest rating of satisfaction all the different types of psychotherapy.*
This is a 1995 report and since this time we have so much more information and help since this survey. Marriage intensives like Hope Restored are available, XO Marriage has created a wonderful marriage counseling program and Dr. John Gottman has given therapists like myself so many helpful trainings.
Still marriage counseling can be discouraging, stressful and expensive for couples. The relunctant spouse can also be a challenge for the other spouse.
*APA Psych Net, The Effectiveness of Psychotherapy, The Consumer Reports Study, Seligman, Martin E.P., American Psychologist, 0150 (12) Dec 1995, 965-974
IT'S EASY AND "DO-ABLE"
Trust and intimacy are essential for a lasting marriage. At A'nesis Marriage Training, we guide couples through exercises that strengthen their bond and create a safe space for vulnerability. Dedicating time to learn about marriage, how to make it work, why it doesn't work ---all in the comfort of your home could help improve your marriage. This is a great platform for the reluctant spouse.